Gaming: Rules of Engagement

How often have you played with a group where there’s no organization and you spend the majority of the game unable to play because someone’s drunk, or someone’s gotten into a heated debate over matters that do not belong at the table?

Through years of trial and error, my core group of twenty years and I developed a system of caveats, our gaming rules of engagement, that ensured hours of enjoyment in gaming.

These are not the gospel of all rules and maybe some things that worked for us, may not work for you. Check this brief article out, and see for yourself if anything here might help turn things around if you’re having trouble keeping a game’s focus where it belongs (on the game itself).

• Be Sober. This rule has been a controversial one in the past, and I’ve been called a Prohibitionist because of it. Sobriety helps keep the focus on the game; even if players enjoy derailing a campaign, sobriety grants players a clear head, and it keeps the game fun.

I do need to sidebar here. 
I don’t personally drink much and when I do, I don’t drink to get drunk. 
I don’t get high on anything, though I’m not judging you if you do.
In the past, our group discovered much to the lament or a ruined session that people who came to the table drunk or high had difficulty focusing on the game, or could focus but didn’t respect the game, the story or the other players. They were disruptive, and harmful to the game. There may be exceptions to the rule of sobriety while playing a tabletop role playing game, but I’ve never witnessed it myself. 

• Escape. Gaming after all is escapism. Leave your problems at the door and keep the real world out of the fantasy world no matter how gritty or realistic an in game world may be. There is a responsible way to leave your problems outside for a few hours and just enjoy the company of fellow gamers. 

• It’s just a Game. Remember that. Some players can get too immersed in a game. It’s always good to take a step back and remember that real life is real life, and games are just games. This doesn’t mean that players recounting events of a game are lost in fantasy if they’re referring to the character and saying “...and then I did this.”, it just means that immersion is good for game. Swim in it, play in it and when the game is over, towel off and get back to life.

• Don’t Meta-game. Just as you don’t possess the knowledge of your character, your character doesn’t possess your knowledge.

• No Godmoding. This should be self explanatory, but it’s surprising how often it’s not. Your character is not the end-all, be-all.

• Don’t Cheat. No one - and I mean no one - wants to play with someone who cheats at a game. The player who manipulates the dice, hides their rolls or uses weighted dice isn’t someone anyone wants at their table. If someone’s ego is so easily bruised by their character’s potential failures they have to cheat to play the game, they probably don’t belong there.

• Share the Spotlight. Gaming is teamwork in real life as much as it is in game. Most games you’ll get equal face time, some games you’ll have more, and some games you’ll have less. Don’t be the player who has to be the center of attention at all times. The goal of the game is to have fun and no one is having fun if a player is railroading other players in favor of their own character.

• Take Breaks. Intermissions are important the longer a game goes on. Some games can be very intense, very hard hitting, and players tend to emotionally invest in a story. There can be times where tensions rise, so have short intermissions and breathe. When you get back to the game, you’ll all be ready to go.

These were the basic rules we used, and it kept our sessions fast, fun and exciting. Gaming works best when you work together as a team, even if in game the characters are mortal enemies. At the end of a session, if the group, the troupe, is happy, then it was a good game.